I need a six-month vacation, twice a year, with snack breaks in between.

Socks have been disappearing since the washing machine became a portal to another dimension.

“Just five more minutes of sleep” – and that’s how the entire day vanished.

Sleeping through alarms is my body saying, “Let’s not.”

Googling symptoms is fun until the answer is: “You’re just sleepy, chill.”

Warning: I may randomly nap, mid-sentence, mid-day, mid-anything.

Today’s goal: eat more foods, dodge humans like a ninja...

Winter’s cool and all, but hibernating like a bear sounds cooler. :)

Trying to adult but accidentally turned into a human couch potato.

Whoever invented homework clearly had too much free time.

I clean, and suddenly it’s like I’ve unearthed relics from a lost civilization.

Coffee is just caffeine therapy in a cup.

My brain has two speeds: overthink everything or forget everything

Opening the fridge like snacks are about to materialize out of sheer hope

Laughing at my own joke – because someone’s gotta appreciate this genius

Same clothes two days in a row? It’s called fashion when no one saw you yesterday

Can’t adult today. Or tomorrow. Or… ever, really

The laundry’s not going to fold itself... unless I develop superpowers

Trying not to finish an entire series in one sitting… who am I kidding? 😂😭

Trying to eat healthy but somehow being outvoted by the snack drawer