😜 "Me: ‘I don’t usually look this good.’
Also me: Yes, I do."

💅 "Your crush’s crush? Yeah, that’s me."

👀 "Crush: ‘I like confident people.’
Me: forgets how to talk, trips over air, disappears into the void."

💋 "Me: Looks good today
Mirror: ‘Damn, who is THAT?!’"

😏 "I’m not flirting… I’m just being extra nice to someone who is extra fine."

🔥 "Warning: Too hot to handle, too lazy to care."

"Me: I'm gonna be productive today!
Also me 5 minutes later: Well, that was a good effort."

"POV: You said ‘just one drink’ and now you're dancing on the bar."

"That moment when you realize you liked the attention, not the person."